I’m melancholy today. I woke up shrouded in it, and after a lifetime of fighting it, I let it be.
When I first starting out in the coaching business, I was told to keep my blog posts light and informative, with numbered steps if possible. God knows I tried! Several years later I had a marketing expert who I really trust read my work, and one of her first comments to me was that I was holding back. I was shocked! I thought she was going tell me to make more how-to lists.
However, she was right. I have rarely shared my anger, my fears, my shame, my joys and content, my anything. I’ve been working under a polish that has held me back. You see, for the longest time I was working under the mostly subconscious notion that to market myself as a coach, I had to present myself as a life expert. Ugh! The weight of it all left me mostly stuck in my tracks. I don’t want to spin in those tracks anymore.
Her wise words have helped me mostly remove the “life expert” lie and shackles from my marketing schtick. Shudder. I’m no life expert (thank God), but I do know that I’m a good coach. I know creative life energy when I see it, hear it, and feel it welling up in my client, waiting to break through and co-create with the world. I know how to talk to it and what scares it and encourages it. I also know it needs to be taught not to be afraid of emotion.
So, today in my melancholy – despite the sun and the early spring light – I wandered into my favorite coffee shop and read the news (always a great place to go when you are melancholy). 😝 I saw that the Affordable Care Act is likely doomed, and my melancholy turned into despair. I despaired for everyone that has a preexisting condition in the US, including myself, which led to more things to despair about, and I won’t bore you with the rest of my pathos. Just know I went down the rabbit hole.
And then I got up and took a walk.
I took a walk because I know that is one of the best ways to soothe your life energy. While I was walking, I saw a familiar site in Seattle: a notice for a new three-story townhouse. It was placed in front a lovely midcentury apartment building I have admired since I moved to this neighborhood. On nice days a Greek grandmother sit on the stoop and tends the gardens in the front. The western exposure is shaded by a magnificent magnolia tree.
Today the magnolia blossoms were blooming.
Magnolias are like nature’s birthday cake, and I smiled despite it all. Yet, thanks to my melancholy, I soon realized the tree wasn’t long for this world. I took a few photographs and shared an homage to the tree on Instagram.
Several people have already engaged with my photo. Perhaps if they know the tree and the apartment building, they will pay their respects, too. Who knows? I love the mystery of it. And now I’ve written this piece. Perhaps it will touch you in a way that you remove the veneer from a part of you that is waiting to engage more creatively in the world.
Want to tap deeper into your own creative life energy? Drop me a line. Here’s the Instagram post.