Trusting the Process

Trust the process. It’s easier said than done. Our brains crave control and for many of us that translates into security, guarantees, and safety. It can feel like a cruel paradox that our brains have evolved to crave safety AND life is inherently unstable and insecure. You could walk outside today and be hit by a car. Boom! Done. It’s terrifying.

You probably won’t be run over today. But because our brains are wired to seek security you may just dwell, dwell, dwell on the fact that it could happen. For those of us who have been there, we know that is no way to live (count me in as one of the dwellers).

The crossing the street example is a simplified version of what most of us encounter everyday: risk. There is inherent risk in most everything we do, and if you want to grow and change you have to accept the risk. There isn’t any way around it*.

There are strands of New Age self-help that say we can rise above the fear of life’s inherent risks, and some even state that simply fearing the risk means you will attract the risk to you. As a daughter of a farmgirl, I call hogwash.

We don’t teach our children to transcend the risk of crossing the street. We teach them to manage the risk through breaking down the process (look right, look left, don’t run), and in turn give them the confidence to do it one day on their own. They learn it is possible to cross the street if they manage the risk. They can see their goal in their mind’s eye, and know they are up for the task.

It’s gets a ton trickier when we take this to the adult playing field. Managing risk when we are asking for a promotion, flex time, or the opportunity to telecommute; starting a business; submitting a story for publication; asking a co-worker for help; and speaking truth to power is exponentially more complicated and difficult. When we boil the process down, however, it is essentially the same. You need the courage, the vision, and the capacity to manage the risk (which includes timing, strategy, practice, and the capacity to tend to your inner self – among other things) to grow and create the change you want to make.  

Metaphorically speaking, trusting the process includes tolerating decaying, once beautiful perennial flowers, and knowing they will come back again next year – most likely.

There is a high probability these daffodils will come back, and yet there is no guarantee.

There is a high probability these daffodils will come back, and yet there is no guarantee.

Fancy talking more about learning to trust the process (and manage the risk) that comes with growth and change? I’d love to talk about it with you. Drop me a line to get started in the form below.

*If your worry and anxiety about risk are overwhelming your ability to function, you may need to seek care from a behavioral health provider. Please consult your doctor if this is the case.

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